Props List:
• Stack of documents (random papers, scrolls, etc.)
• Large book
• Sealed scroll or parchment
• Small chest
• Roll of toilet paper
Cast List:
• King – Agitated and demanding, insists on receiving his “royal papers.”
• Royal Courtier – Frantic, eager to please but keeps bringing the wrong items.
• Various Courtiers – Each brings a different “royal” item and gets scolded.
• Jester – The unlikely hero who finally delivers what the King truly needs.
Description:
The King, growing increasingly distressed, demands his “royal papers.” Courtiers rush in with official documents, books, and scrolls, each promptly rejected. Tension and frustration escalate as the wrong items keep arriving. Finally, the Jester strolls in with a humble roll of toilet paper. The King immediately rewards him with a knighthood and dashes offstage in visible relief.
Script:
(The scene opens in the royal court. The King sits upon his throne, shifting uncomfortably.)
King:
(urgently) “Where are my royal papers?!”
(A Royal Courtier rushes in, breathless, carrying a thick stack of documents.)
Royal Courtier:
(presenting the papers) “Here, Your Majesty! The kingdom’s tax records, land deeds, and royal treaties—”
King:
(furious) “Bah! These are worthless! I said my royal papers!” (He throws them aside.)
(Another courtier enters, holding a massive book.)
Second Courtier:
“Perhaps the Great Book of Laws, my liege?”
King:
(irritated) “No! My royal papers!” (Hurls the book away.)
(A third courtier enters with a grand, sealed scroll.)
Third Courtier:
“Sire, your latest proclamation, signed and sealed?”
King:
(stomping foot) “Am I speaking in riddles?! I need my royal papers!” (Throws the scroll to the ground.)
(A fourth courtier hurries in with a small chest, bowing low.)
Fourth Courtier:
“Might it be these sacred royal documents?”
King:
(turning red) “Why am I surrounded by buffoons?! My. Royal. Papers. NOW!”
(Suddenly, the Jester skips in, holding a roll of toilet paper high like a sacred relic.)
Jester:
(grinning) “Behold, O King! Your most royal of papers!”
(A hush falls over the court. The King’s eyes widen in realization. He leaps from his throne, clutching the toilet paper like a lifeline.)
King:
(teary-eyed) “You… you have saved the kingdom!”
(He dramatically kneels, knights the Jester with great ceremony, and places his own royal crown upon the Jester’s head.)
King:
“Arise, Sir Jester, Keeper of the Most Sacred Scroll!”
(Then, without another word, he clutches the toilet paper and dashes offstage. The courtiers look at each other in confusion before bowing to the newly knighted Jester. The lights fade as the Jester gives an exaggerated bow.)
End Scene.